Emo status

My life sucks.

I fail as a son, I fail as a grandson.

I fail as a family member, I fail as a relative.

I fail as a student, I fail as a subject representative.

I fail as a chairperson, I fail as a vice-captain.

I fail as an educated person, I fail as an entertainer.

I fail as a dancer, I fail as a singer.

I fail as an actor, I fail as a friend.

I fail as a classmate, I fail as a schoolmate.

I fail in interpersonal skills, I fail in relationships.

I fail as a neighbour, I fail as a citizen.

I fail as a human, I fail in my life.

But hey I succeed in making myself a failure,

Which means I fail as a failure.

Oh my, my life sucks; Fail-u’re.

25. A young woman wanted to make her sex life more interesting and hence decided to do something extraordinary. She began to greet her husband when he comes back from work nude, yes nude.
An old women heard about this and wanted to try it out. She waited for her husband to return and greeted him nude. Her husband then said something, what he said?
I think you should iron your clothes.(no offense)

24. What Happened to the fly on the toilet seat?
He got pissed off! ( one of my favourite too)

23. A traveling salesman was driving down a country road when a rabbit ran in front of his car and he hit it. The proverbial farmer was sitting on the fence watching. The salesman gets out of his car and opens the trunk. He then removes an aerosol can and sprays the contents on the dead rabbit. The next thing you know the rabbit gets up and hops about 20 ft. down the road, turns and waves to the salesman, goes another 20 ft. and waves to the salesman. The salesman looks at the farmer and says "he'll be ok ay now." The salesman gets into his car and leaves. The farmer wondering what's going on walks over to the ditch where the salesman threw the can, picks it up and read the label which said FOR HARE RESTORATION AND PERMANENT WAVE.
Personal favourite.

22. Why do they put bells on cows?
Because their horns don't work!

21. A history teacher asked his students why they hated history?
They answer because they see no future in it.

20. There are three kinds of people in the world. Those who can count. And those who can't.
(means i cannot count)